tears and time

I recently read the ABMP article "Tears and Time: Being Mindful of Your Emotional Response to the COVID-19 Pandemic." As I read this article, I recognized many of my experiences. Relief at having a respite from the demanding work routine I was doing weekly. Optimism at what I could get completed - a garden! paint that wall! organize my recipes!! Exhaustion at the thought of thinking of doing any of those things or, some days, doing really anything. Sadness. Grief for the plans, hopes, dreams, and events that won't take place.

I've had lovely moments of connection with others. I've appreciated laughter and humor even more than I did before. I've experienced gratitude for shelter, for food, for sleep, for transportation, for running water, for health insurance. I've been humbled by the kindness of others and have tried to offer kindness.

Many people, both in this country and around the world don't have these things to be grateful for. My own powerlessness to influence those peoples' lives is a painful thing to sit with. I have visions of a Star-Trek-Next-Generation-type world where basic needs are met and everyone contributes for the benefit of all.

For now, I did plant a garden. As I watch those tiny, optimistic leaves push up through the surface of the soil, excited to be lettuce, carrots, or chard, I remember that I'm always renewing, always growing as a person, and always learning. And even though, right now, I'm not able to help others much, soon I'll be able to again, and I'll be able to do so with a spirit that knows that helping others is such a privilege and something I truly appreciate and am grateful to be able to do.

Here is the link to the article if you'd like to read it. There are links to resources at the end of the article.

https://www.abmp.com/updates/blog-posts/tears-and-time-being-mindful-your-emotional-response-covid-19-pandemic